I can’t believe how long it’s been since I updated anything! I continue to make Friday night Shabbat dinners (including all the traditional candles, challah, wine and blessings) every week. The candles are almost always lit on time. if Ilight after, then I don’t say the blessing, so we have some atmosphere, but not to mix up the ideas.

What else can I say?

My day and week don’t feel right if I don’t.

I wear modest clothes most days and times,

sometimes jeans or other stuff, but what depends on event.

I suddenly decide I believe in God. I decide that life is as you make it. What gives?

Here is blog that I just found,due to the blogger being so kind as post a supportive comment on my last exhausted post:

http://desperatefaith.blogspot.com

When is Moshiach coming?

And do we have to make this ideal version of the world ourselves?

How are we going to better the world?

I just spent a few hours at the house of an amazingly (it would seem by their property) well of family. Are they happier than me? Are they less insecure? Do I want to be like them? I think now. But it’s fun while it lasted.