I haven’t been writing much.

I changed the theme again. I can’t seem to decide upon a better theme, since I became bored with the earlier one.

So it may be changing again soon.

I was thinking about our Creator.

While it is easy to imagine a Creator, I find it much harder to believe in a personal G-d. The closest I get is a sort of Jung-like communal consciousness that may or may not include a “one-consciousness” that we experience as G-d sometimes.

At the same time, Judaism has such a good grasp of the way things work, spiritually, emotionally and physically, that it is what I need.

May I have more clarity on this subject as needed, and soon!

Jack’s Shack had a post about a similar issue that I read today, and I had to finish this post I was working on about it.

This issue is what really had me starting this blog.

I grew up with mother who called herself post-feminist (20 years ago) and really she was pre-feminist.

Then she went through her “phase” as my father called it of no cooking and saying rude things in general about men.

I did that the first 5 or so years of my marriage–and after that I “found” Judaism and after seeing that it had a more evenly-partnered view of a marriage (than the somewhat traditional Christianity I had become involved in). See the first post of my blog for a short intro about that. And then embraced somewhat more traditional Judaism from having influence by Chabad that introduced me to everything Jewish.

On the other hand, even if he has some possible of being related to, my husband is not Jewish.

So that has kept me close to the questions of everything.

To be continued…

The first is about the kosher meat question. And I like the opinion expressed here. I had been trying to formulate for myself if I thought the meat was kosher to buy, and now it makes sense what I was thinking–and it was something along these lines.

Next I was looking at the NY Times online, and this article caught my eye about Michelle Obama.

She is very interesting to me as a woman, since I keep looking for role models who are married and also strong and making their own choices and opinions. Maybe this shows how unformed I am as a grown woman–but so be it then.

I have to start somewhere.

I have not written in so long, in part because I have some good ideas, but every time I sit down to write, it seems something else is more important. Am I having procrastination? I think it’s more of I had been unsure of where I stand on anything.

So, that’s all for today

…and should be out as soon as possible!

Here is an article on the Chabad website I liked today “If you could be G-d for one week, what would you do” that actually seems like a good intro into Judaism…at least the way I introduced myself to it over the internet. It fits in better with my recent more-agnostic leanings that have been not strong enough to disturb me, yet.

Actually I think it’s good that I was getting away from my overly detailed analysis of everything. I was getting too involved in understanding details to the point it could have backlashed.

I am sad today at the same time as I am proud of my improvements as a healthy person.

Sad about:

• My shouting at my kids, even though it has been much less since I made a resolve to stop shouting a few weeks ago. (I am never sure if I fall in the mid-range of shouty-type mothers, although I suspect that I do. I am not a horrible howling monster, but I also do not always keep a level calm tone. Well only in public, anyway.
• Still not getting dinner on time
• Not having planned our budget and figured out how much I need to work now that the baby’s born; I keep hoping if I don’t that I’ll find out we are just fine with me at home working only an occasional hour or so, but really all I can say is: HA HA. REALITY CHECK PLEASE!!
• My little baby has a cold
• My friend’s little baby is not strong: any of you reading this, who does feel the urge, please say a little prayer that the baby become stronger and come home soon
• That I have not edited this post, and I am not sure what to delete since it looks mostly blah so far.

Things that I am happy about

• That I have enough presence of mind to write a happy list to balance out the sad list
• the relatively good health of my family members
• the pleasant mood my husband’s been in (he hasn’t complained too much…well, not too much…about the late dinners)
• Internet connection
• NPR radio
• The place we live is clean and warm, Thank G-d

I apologize about the un-well formed post, but this is today’s mode. Not perfect, but something.

Your Thinking is Abstract and Random

You are flexible, adaptable, and creative. There’s many ways that you can learn - and you’re up for any of them. You relate well to other people, and you do well working in groups. You can help people communicate together and work with each other’s strengths. You don’t work well with people who are competitive or adversarial. You prefer to work toward a common goal… not toward conflicting goals.

What Kind of Thinker Are You?

I am working on taxes today. Fun fun fun!

Here is a link to an article in the NY Times.  It is about how farming/contact with animals helps people with various mental disorders.

Maybe we should buy a pet!

More later…

FJB

NO MORE SNOOZE BUTTON

I have other things to say, but I am not quite sure. I have been so busy being a temporarily-stay-at-home-mom-without-a-drivable-car. We got the car out of the garage finally yesterday (lots of car things been going on these past few weeks) and now I am not quite sure what to do with myself.